Nostalgia talks to me.
Do you see your childhood slipping away?
He taunts.
Remember swings?
You're too big now.
I talk back to him.
Do you see how you're torturing me?
I know these.
I remember swings
And love them.
Nostalgia swings with me.
And with each sway he whispers,
Another year,
another day
you will not have again.
I cry as I swing.
Tell me, Nostalgia, what do I do?
I've loved these years.
If I let myself turn another,
I will not have the last.
Stay, he says.
Do not let them go.
But I can't.
I'm too big for the swing
and my hands hurt
from gripping the chains
so tightly.
I let go.
I've been having some serious nostalgia/ homesickness/ sentimentality lately. Today is officially my twentieth birthday, which just seems so strange for some reason. I've been thinking a lot about growing up with my family and how so many things have changed over the years. When I was little, it was all about me and my 7 other siblings running around, playing, and going to school. Now I can look at my 12 nieces and nephews and reminisce about what it was like. As much as some of my feelings are telling me that getting older is something to avoid, I want to embrace it with all that I have. I have been given beautiful life. Each day is a gift that I do not deserve.
The friends I've been abundantly blessed with. My ever-growing family that loves me so. A school that feeds me truth every single day. A room of my very own to sleep in every night. Cameras, paint brushes, pencils, and fabric to create whatever my heart desires. Cold weather for my birthday weekend. A child running to give me a big hug. People that tell me they love me.
There is no way that I have done anything to deserve the least of these. Yet they have been given to me so graciously. And even still, these do not compare to the most beautiful gift I've been given. Without it, all of these would mean nothing.
I proclaim with all that I have that the redemption given me through Jesus Christ, Son of God, is the only reason I live. And for him, I will give 20 years of my life without hesitation. And for him, I will be glad and rejoice to live more.
